Infidelity Part 2

Is everything okay with you?

So, a few days ago, I made a post asking if a spouse should reveal their infidelity to the other.

I saw on two Catholic websites that a priest could recommend not revealing it if it was a brief affair.

Reading this answer left me quite confused, and in a way, it shook my faith because I didn’t understand how this could be recommended by a priest. Also, I have OCD, so “unresolved” moral and religious issues trigger obsessive thoughts.

Then, after thinking a bit more, I understood that not telling doesn’t necessarily mean lying.

That is, if the cheating spouse is asked about their fidelity, they should, in my opinion, reveal what they did, because lying is not part of Christian doctrine, and if the truth leads to a rupture in the relationship, it would just be a consequence of the sin that was committed.

Along with that, I also made a post here on Reddit asking for your opinions, and that’s why this post is now titled “Part 2.”

In the post I made a few days ago, I was recommended to talk to a priest, and well, that’s what I did today during the confession time at the nearest parish.

After the conversation, I became even more confused, as I asked if the cheating spouse could lie when questioned about their fidelity, and the answer I got seemed to suggest that yes.

In summary, I was told that marriage should always be preserved, and therefore the cheating spouse should opt for the “lesser evil.”

Perhaps the answer wasn’t definitive or appropriate because I asked other questions, unrelated to this, during the conversation, and the time for conversation was limited since it was confession time.

Additionally, since it wasn’t a pre-scheduled meeting, the priest might not have been prepared for my questions and didn’t provide the best answer at the time.

Anyway, what do you think? Even in a situation where there’s a direct question, should the spouse lie?

Wouldn’t that be inappropriate?

Also, if lying is allowed to “keep the marriage together,” would it be better to trust a friend or a stranger rather than your own spouse, since they might lie to avoid responsibility for their own actions?

This issue has caused confusion and discouragement because I have OCD and am coming back from a period of distance from the Church, plus I plan to get married.

Could you explain if there is any basis for this response, if I should try talking to the priest again to see if I get the same answer, or if I should consult another priest from another church?