Does anyone else terribly want to believe in an afterlife, but just…can’t?

I really want an afterlife to be real. Death scares me terribly, and this is one of the main reasons I’m religious. And I do consider myself religious. But it’s so hard for me to actually believe in anything transcendent. I like to think I do trust in an afterlife and some sort of god, but my fear that there is nothing after death and that I will cease to exist, and the quaking which precedes my every sleep as a result, says otherwise.